R.I.P. Sandy :(

Well unfortunately Sandy's time had come. I've been wrestling with having her put to sleep for quite a while now, every time I thought that it was her time..she would do something amazing and let me know she just wasn't ready yet. The end of last week she was beginning to look very very skinny- she was eating almost non stop and still seemed to be losing weight (from her body), but that tumor just kept growing and growing. The skin was becoming necrotic from lack of proper blood supply. I just couldn't let her continue on in that state. She was still fairly happy but I knew she would go down hill fast.

Saturday morning I called my vet and they said I could bring her in. We waited in the waiting room and she was very very good. She sat in a blanket in my arms and just ate a million chocolate chips..I let her have as many as she wanted until they took her back. She went very quickly, I think her heart was weak from dragging that thing around for so long. I'm glad she went quickly for her sake and mine.

When you take care of a sick or elderly animal for a long period of time, you create a strong bond with them- and although sometimes she only *tolerated* me..I know she loved me. And I loved her so very very much. On Sunday I buried her in one of her blankets, next to all her previous brothers and sisters that I had before her. This is how I will always remember my girl:

Before the nasty monster tumor!

I'm a little worried about Dee, she's the only oldie left and she loved cuddling with Sandy..they were best buds. Now she's dealing with the 2 little brats who never calm down! She's seems to be getting along pretty well though. No signs of withdrawal or anything so I think she'll be ok. I do always find her cuddled with the other girls so I think they're giving her lots of cuddles.

I was not looking forward to making this post- even though I knew the day would come, you can never be fully prepared to say goodbye to a pet. And no matter how many you've had to say goodbye to in the past, it never gets any easier. It hit me Saturday night when I didn't have to give her her meds...thank god my boyfriend was here..or it would have been even more of a rough night.

Well I'm working on a new video for the channel now, then I'm gonna get my chores done and head to bed early I think tonight, it was a long and stressful weekend.

Daily Boggles:

• I rented 4 movies tonight, The Chernobyl Diaries, Hotel Transylvania, Men in Black 3, and Ted. I also bought Dark Shadows- the new Johnny Depp movie..so I'll keep myself busy there..lol
• work has been picking up a lot more..I was scheduled for 5 days this week (although I was sent home early today because we were so slow)
• I kinda feel like I might be getting sick again, I hope not!
• I need to stop neglecting this blog..for some reason I can't seem to keep up with this blog! ugh! Sorry bout that!

I spoke too soon about Sandy :(

I was so excited about Sandy last night, but I spoke too soon :(. I was cleaning the cage this afternoon and I was checking on Sandy and I found that she had a section on the tumor with a decent amount of pooled blood under the skin..I'm not sure what's happened if it's a ruptured blood vessel or if the tumor itself is rupturing..*sigh*. I've made a few posts on the rat forum that I'm a part of to get some opinions on what it is, and where I should go from here. She's not acting like she is in any pain and she wasn't acting any differently- other then she didn't want to be picked up (which is understandable--she never did like to be held much). So right now I'm playing a waiting game before I decide what I want to do. I'll update again as soon as I figure out what I'm doing. Here's a video I shot this afternoon...:/

I'm in SHOCK!!

So I've been contemplating what to do with Sandy, with that large tumor and all. I've been hinting in previous posts that I think her time is getting close...well tonight she was out to prove me wrong in a BIG way! So I was sitting here watching some tv and I heard the wheel going round, I glanced over and SANDY was on the wheel! She was actually walking/slow running on it! I guess she's trying to make it clear to me that she isn't quite ready yet. It's just funny cause I haven't seen her on that thing in quite a while (although she could have been and I just didn't pay attention). She never fails to surprise me with how well she deals with that thing. Some people might think its cruel of me to keep her alive with it being so huge...but my gut instinct is that she's just not ready. As long as she can get around, eat, drink, and isn't in any pain or discomfort--I'm willing to keep trucking for her. She's not much of a *people* rat...but I know she loves me and appreciates me...and I admire her for her strength. She's almost 2 and a half years old (pretty old for a rat) and lugging around a tumor the size of a baseball...and shes HAPPY! She teaches me about strength and how to persevere when life just sucks..She's such a beautiful little girl <3.

Daily Boggles:

• I've been working a lot of hours lately so I'm incredibly exhausted..I'm so glad I can sleep in tomorrow..I hope I get up before like 2 pm..lol
• I've been watching this show called Man, Woman, Wild..it's about a husband and wife team who survive in the wild..its crazy, they eat bugs and all kinds of stuff.its so gross..lol but very interesting
• not sure what videos I wanna do this week..but I suppose I should get on it...since I'm going to have to film both videos tomorrow probably..then I can edit all day Tuesday..then work Wednesday and Thursday.
• Time for bed!